doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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