I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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