I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize