It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Randomize