happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
foreskin is a definite game changer
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
