My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
