My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
