Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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