I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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