Well apparently he's into motor boating.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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