yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
