If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
