She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
