Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
