Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize