you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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