He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
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And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
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Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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