i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
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As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
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I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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