I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
