He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
my poor anus
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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