Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
