i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
