Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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