A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Let's get the cat blown out
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
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