Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
