we made out on top of his cat.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
