so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Randomize
