my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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