i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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