i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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