Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
