i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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