Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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