doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
