just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
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