Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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