I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize