Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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