do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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