Are we in a gay sports bar?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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