it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize