i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.