Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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