Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I deserve this hangover.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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