The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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