The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Randomize
