why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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