what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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