I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Randomize
