I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
