I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
