I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
