I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
